We all feel a bit perturbed by computer hardware now and then, but a Washington State prison guard recently took high-tech retribution to distasteful new extremes.
According to local police, Willie M. Shannon, 26, may be charged with urinating on a municipal jail computer after being arrested following a drunken brawl at a nearby nightclub.
While confined in a holding cell, Shannon apparently relieved himself through a protective screen onto a nearby computer workstation. Damage to a computer, monitor, fax machine and other hardware was estimated at US$1,500, and other equipment was rendered unusable because of contamination. Now there’s an IT repair job no one wants.
Shannon, it should be noted, was relieved of his job soon afterwards.
The sports seasons are upon us
Autumn is the season of sports, which may explain the timing of the launch of a new e-business dubbed ProTrade.com. The Web site treats professional athletes like stocks to be bought and sold, initially in a theoretical currency. Cash prizes will be awarded to the most successful investors.
The value of a blue-chip quarterback such as Peyton Manning of the Indianapolis Colts ($267.12 U.S. at press time) will be determined by a community of traders competing to identify players most likely to contribute to the success of their real-life teams.
And who was the least expensive athlete up for grabs on the site at press time? That honour goes to quarterback Todd Bouman of the New Orleans Saints, priced at $9.94 (U.S). Todd, it might be time to shave the goatee.
Why IT gets you nowhere
This is good for a chuckle: A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes he is lost. He reduces height and spots another man down below in a field. He lowers his balloon further and shouts to the man “Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?”
The man below replies: “Yes, you’re in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field.”
“You must work in IT,” the balloonist remarks.
“I do,” replies the man. “How did you know?”
“Well,” says the balloonist, “everything you’ve told me is technically correct, but it’s of no use to anyone!”
The man below says “You must work in business”
“Yes,” replies the balloonist, “how did you know?”
“Well,” says the man, “You don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in exactly the same position as you were before we met, but now it’s my fault!”